Inbreeding Animals, Escaping Arrestees, and Zhiguli Is Back

In this week's Odder News, new old Zhigulis are for sale, animal populations need more diversity, and a music awards ceremony turns into a protest.

• The cutest arrestee ever was recorded this week jumping out of a police van. The Saransk man is seen opening the back door while the vehicle is stuck in traffic, making the "shh" gesture to the car behind him, and walking off camera. Unfortunately for the man, two police officers jumped out of the van and grabbed him, shoving him back into the van – probably less gently than they had the first time.
• The Berlin Zoo was thrilled to get a bouncing baby polar bear from the Moscow Zoo... until it discovered that the cub's parents were brother and sister. The Moscow Zoo realized the mistake and admitted it to Berlin. The cub, with the very non-Russian name of Hertha, appears to be healthy. But her parents, Tonya and Volodya, have spread their genetic material so far and wide among the zoological community that biologists better keep a keen eye on the paperwork going forward.
• It's official: enough time has passed that a Zhiguli is more valuable than a Mercedes for nostalgia purposes. The Soviet car has "moved from the category of junk to the category of vintage car." In the past year, the price of a new Mercedes has risen by twenty-five percent, and for a used one, thirty-one percent. But get this: the Zhiguli (used only!) price has risen by more than thirty-two percent. According to one writer, people over forty buy the cars their dads drove when they were kids, or that their dads wished they could afford, thus fulfilling their fathers' dreams. So, go out and get your dad's Soviet-era car while it still runs! It will apparently announce your arrival with a "graceful retro-style cough." While you are at it, be sure to read the cover story in our May/June issue about Zhiguli mania and racing.
• To start off the post-pandemic (kind of) summer resort season, a mutant dolphin showed up near Crimea's shores. As if to welcome the sunbathers from the sea, the dolphin showed off its trident-shaped fluke. This is not the first mutant dolphin found in the region, and biologists suspect inbreeding from lack of local variation to be the cause. Darn, we were hoping it was King Triton!
• Russian rapper Morgenshtern protested Muz-TV giving its singer of the year award to Alexander Revva – who sings under the pseudonym Artur Pirozhkov. Morgenshtern leaped up from his wheelchair, which he was apparently using for the first time, to yell, "I protest!" Revva-Pirozhkov put his finger to his head as if indicating Morgenshtern is crazy, and Sergei Lazarev smiled awkwardly while Ksenia Sobchak tried to usher Morgenshtern quickly off the stage. The internet still does not know if the whole wild affair was a prank or not.