November 14, 2019

Baggage Bros, Covert Crimea, and Brezhnev's Crimes


Baggage Bros, Covert Crimea, and Brezhnev's Crimes
Revenge is a dish best served by a cat. Mikhail Galin

Quote of the Week

“Certain comrades of mine forbid me to quote Elon Musk, so I’m going to quote Stalin.”

— Yuri Urlichich, First Deputy Director of Roscosmos, giving a speech at a conference

Cat’s in the Cradle, Crimean Boogaloo

1. “Bros should be around bros, not in the luggage.” This was the quote that inspired frequent flier Mikhail Galin to resort to extreme measures to save his cat, Viktor. Mikhail wanted to bring Viktor onboard an Aeroflot flight, but air staff said Viktor was too heavy to ride in the cabin and would have to ride in the luggage compartment. So Mikhail performed a daring swap. He went home and used his miles to redeem a business class ticket for the next day. Meanwhile, he sought via Facebook and found a cat-double for Victor and had him weighed at the airport screening… then swapped back in Viktor for the flight. Unfortunately, Mikhail paid a heavy price for his heist: he was found out and his frequent flying account was cancelled. Clearly, no sacrifice is too great for a man to make for his cat.

"I/we stand for Fat Cat"
All of the RuNet is rooting for Mikhail and Viktor. / @leonidragozin via Twitter

2. One driver in the city of Astrakhan noticed an odd road sign. On a bridge leading to Crimea Street, someone had put up a prominent red sign reading “Crimea Bridge.” Evidently feeling like spending his weekend by the Black Sea, the driver drove up to the bridge and crossed it, joking, “Look, we’re going to Crimea.” No one is really sure who put the sign up. Perhaps it was a patriot for whom distance made the heart grow fonder for Crimea’s recent “reunification” (Astrakhan is 600 miles from Crimea). Or maybe it was a prankster underlining that there was no need to annex other people’s territory: the real Crimea was within us all along.

Crimea Bridge in Astrakhan
Crimea's just around the corner. / Astrakhan Online

3. You may never be able to collect all of Leonid Brezhnev’s medals. But today, for a paltry 1.5 million rubles ($25,000), you can buy the only driving ticket he ever received. Of course, it’s not a real ticket — the Minister of the Interior gave it to Brezhnev as a joke. But Brezhnev did have a real driver’s license that permitted its holder to drive “all categories of vehicles.” Both the license and his fake ticket are being auctioned off today. (It’s unlikely to stagnate at the block.)


In Odder News

  • New Zealanders are accusing Russia of interfering in their election — that is, their election for bird of the year.
  • Thousands of miles from Hawaii in the Pacific Ocean, surfers in Kamchatka are making waves among Russians who love the tide.
Surfing in Kamchatka
Surf's up in Siberia. / BBC
  • What are your favorite Russian cities to visit? One poll asked travellers to reveal their rankings. Check it out and see how they stack up against yours.

Thanks to David Edwards for a story idea!

Want more where this comes from? Give your inbox the gift of TWERF, our Thursday newsletter on the quirkiest, obscurest, and Russianest of Russian happenings of the week.

Like this post? Get a weekly email digest + member-only deals

Some of Our Books

White Magic

White Magic

The thirteen tales in this volume – all written by Russian émigrés, writers who fled their native country in the early twentieth century – contain a fair dose of magic and mysticism, of terror and the supernatural. There are Petersburg revenants, grief-stricken avengers, Lithuanian vampires, flying skeletons, murders and duels, and even a ghostly Edgar Allen Poe.
Bears in the Caviar

Bears in the Caviar

Bears in the Caviar is a hilarious and insightful memoir by a diplomat who was “present at the creation” of US-Soviet relations. Charles Thayer headed off to Russia in 1933, calculating that if he could just learn Russian and be on the spot when the US and USSR established relations, he could make himself indispensable and start a career in the foreign service. Remarkably, he pulled it of.
The Latchkey Murders

The Latchkey Murders

Senior Lieutenant Pavel Matyushkin is back on the case in this prequel to the popular mystery Murder at the Dacha, in which a serial killer is on the loose in Khrushchev’s Moscow...
Tolstoy Bilingual

Tolstoy Bilingual

This compact, yet surprisingly broad look at the life and work of Tolstoy spans from one of his earliest stories to one of his last, looking at works that made him famous and others that made him notorious. 
The Frogs Who Begged for a Tsar (bilingual)

The Frogs Who Begged for a Tsar (bilingual)

The fables of Ivan Krylov are rich fonts of Russian cultural wisdom and experience – reading and understanding them is vital to grasping the Russian worldview. This new edition of 62 of Krylov’s tales presents them side-by-side in English and Russian. The wonderfully lyrical translations by Lydia Razran Stone are accompanied by original, whimsical color illustrations by Katya Korobkina.
Murder and the Muse

Murder and the Muse

KGB Chief Andropov has tapped Matyushkin to solve a brazen jewel heist from Picasso’s wife at the posh Metropole Hotel. But when the case bleeds over into murder, machinations, and international intrigue, not everyone is eager to see where the clues might lead.
A Taste of Russia

A Taste of Russia

The definitive modern cookbook on Russian cuisine has been totally updated and redesigned in a 30th Anniversary Edition. Layering superbly researched recipes with informative essays on the dishes' rich historical and cultural context, A Taste of Russia includes over 200 recipes on everything from borshch to blini, from Salmon Coulibiac to Beef Stew with Rum, from Marinated Mushrooms to Walnut-honey Filled Pies. A Taste of Russia shows off the best that Russian cooking has to offer. Full of great quotes from Russian literature about Russian food and designed in a convenient wide format that stays open during use.
Faith & Humor: Notes from Muscovy

Faith & Humor: Notes from Muscovy

A book that dares to explore the humanity of priests and pilgrims, saints and sinners, Faith & Humor has been both a runaway bestseller in Russia and the focus of heated controversy – as often happens when a thoughtful writer takes on sacred cows. The stories, aphorisms, anecdotes, dialogues and adventures in this volume comprise an encyclopedia of modern Russian Orthodoxy, and thereby of Russian life.
Driving Down Russia's Spine

Driving Down Russia's Spine

The story of the epic Spine of Russia trip, intertwining fascinating subject profiles with digressions into historical and cultural themes relevant to understanding modern Russia. 
The Little Humpbacked Horse (bilingual)

The Little Humpbacked Horse (bilingual)

A beloved Russian classic about a resourceful Russian peasant, Vanya, and his miracle-working horse, who together undergo various trials, exploits and adventures at the whim of a laughable tsar, told in rich, narrative poetry.
Stargorod: A Novel in Many Voices

Stargorod: A Novel in Many Voices

Stargorod is a mid-sized provincial city that exists only in Russian metaphorical space. It has its roots in Gogol, and Ilf and Petrov, and is a place far from Moscow, but close to Russian hearts. It is a place of mystery and normality, of provincial innocence and Black Earth wisdom. Strange, inexplicable things happen in Stargorod. So do good things. And bad things. A lot like life everywhere, one might say. Only with a heavy dose of vodka, longing and mystery.

About Us

Russian Life is a publication of a 30-year-young, award-winning publishing house that creates a bimonthly magazine, books, maps, and other products for Russophiles the world over.

Latest Posts

Our Contacts

Russian Life
73 Main Street, Suite 402
Montpelier VT 05602

802-223-4955