October 24, 2019

Raining Cats and Hot Dogs


Raining Cats and Hot Dogs
Plotting escape: You ca(n’)t cat-ch meeeee! Podslushano, Novomoskovsk | Vkontakte

Quote of the Week

“Get your missiles out of Cuba. Everyone will say ‘Yay! Krushchev! You’re the best!’ But if you don’t everybody will be like ‘what an asshole’ and call your garbage country ‘the Soviet Bunion.’”
– Hillary Clinton, trolling President Trump by tweeting a letter allegedly “found in the archives” that JFK wrote to Khrushchev during the Cuban Missile Crisis (which began two days and 57 years ago), suspiciously similar to the letter Trump sent to Erdogan about the invasion of Kurdish-controlled regions of Syria… which even Vladimir Putin called “unusual.” 

Wrenching two main stories out of high-value cats 

1. A cat, detained for smuggling drugs into a Russian prison, escaped from behind bars. The cat was being held for evidence, after prosecutors claimed that he was trained by prisoners as a feline ferry, bringing them narcotics in a secret compartment in his collar. The defense attorneys thought that would be a task akin to herding cats; since when have the animals done what humans request? Now we will never know; keepers let the cat out of the cage due to cold weather, and he was being chased off by dogs. If cats have nine lives, then this one must have had some prison-breaking bad prior ones. 

2. It was the time of the worst of cats, but also the best of cats. The deaf Oracle Achilles, one of the Hermitage Cats, became famous for predicting outcomes in the 2018 World Cup by choosing food bowls marked with a particular country’s flag. The kitten of this prophetic palace cat (who is also a successful therapist, and Instagram model) was sold at an auction to raise funds for homeless animals at the World of Cats expo in St. Petersburg. The father was an honored guest at the event – but then, that is pretty predictable. 

Oracle cat in Russia
A cat of many talents, such as squatting while giving unsettling stares. / Achillcat | Instagram

3. A Russian inventor thinks he has found the key to success: a winter wrench (literally: “bolt key”). The Russian patent office named the heated hand tool the strangest patent application of the year, but unusual can be useful. The head of the department apparently warmed to the idea: “Anyone who has encountered the necessity of screwing or unscrewing some sort of bolt in -40º weather can value the unusual nature of such a wrench.” Best of all, it is bright red, so when you drop it in the snow you can see two-thirds of the Russian flag, and more importantly, find your wrench. Such a situation is at least as quintessentially Russian as whatever problems all the other innovations – mostly for farming, electronics, medicine, and oil and gas – are intended to solve.

 

In Odder News

  • Russia’s version of a hotdog – “sausage in dough” – is the best thing since sliced bread. Literally. It’s Russia’s favorite bread product, beating… sliced bread. 
  • Plastic pakety? Russians are bagging them. 
  • The Ukrainian president was caught dozing on the Moscow metro. At least, that’s what it looks like: the doppelganger is actually an immigrant from Uzbekistan. 

Spookily similar, even in mannerisms… this is no Halloween costume. Mash | Youtube

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Some of our Books

Life Stories
September 01, 2009

Life Stories

The Life Stories collection is a nice introduction to contemporary Russian fiction: many of the 19 authors featured here have won major Russian literary prizes and/or become bestsellers. These are life-affirming stories of love, family, hope, rebirth, mystery and imagination, masterfully translated by some of the best Russian-English translators working today. The selections reassert the power of Russian literature to affect readers of all cultures in profound and lasting ways. Best of all, 100% of the profits from the sale of this book are going to benefit Russian hospice—not-for-profit care for fellow human beings who are nearing the end of their own life stories.

The Pet Hawk of the House of Abbas
October 01, 2013

The Pet Hawk of the House of Abbas

This exciting new trilogy by a Russian author – who has been compared to Orhan Pamuk and Umberto Eco – vividly recreates a lost world, yet its passions and characters are entirely relevant to the present day. Full of mystery, memorable characters, and non-stop adventure, The Pet Hawk of the House of Abbas is a must read for lovers of historical fiction and international thrillers.

 
Little Golden Calf
February 01, 2010

Little Golden Calf

Our edition of The Little Golden Calf, one of the greatest Russian satires ever, is the first new translation of this classic novel in nearly fifty years. It is also the first unabridged, uncensored English translation ever, and is 100% true to the original 1931 serial publication in the Russian journal 30 Dnei. Anne O. Fisher’s translation is copiously annotated, and includes an introduction by Alexandra Ilf, the daughter of one of the book’s two co-authors.

At the Circus
January 01, 2013

At the Circus

This wonderful novella by Alexander Kuprin tells the story of the wrestler Arbuzov and his battle against a renowned American wrestler. Rich in detail and characterization, At the Circus brims with excitement and life. You can smell the sawdust in the big top, see the vivid and colorful characters, sense the tension build as Arbuzov readies to face off against the American.

The Samovar Murders
November 01, 2019

The Samovar Murders

The murder of a poet is always more than a murder. When a famous writer is brutally stabbed on the campus of Moscow’s Lumumba University, the son of a recently deposed African president confesses, and the case assumes political implications that no one wants any part of.

Moscow and Muscovites
November 26, 2013

Moscow and Muscovites

Vladimir Gilyarovsky's classic portrait of the Russian capital is one of Russians’ most beloved books. Yet it has never before been translated into English. Until now! It is a spectactular verbal pastiche: conversation, from gutter gibberish to the drawing room; oratory, from illiterates to aristocrats; prose, from boilerplate to Tolstoy; poetry, from earthy humor to Pushkin. 

Stargorod: A Novel in Many Voices
May 01, 2013

Stargorod: A Novel in Many Voices

Stargorod is a mid-sized provincial city that exists only in Russian metaphorical space. It has its roots in Gogol, and Ilf and Petrov, and is a place far from Moscow, but close to Russian hearts. It is a place of mystery and normality, of provincial innocence and Black Earth wisdom. Strange, inexplicable things happen in Stargorod. So do good things. And bad things. A lot like life everywhere, one might say. Only with a heavy dose of vodka, longing and mystery.

Murder and the Muse
December 12, 2016

Murder and the Muse

KGB Chief Andropov has tapped Matyushkin to solve a brazen jewel heist from Picasso’s wife at the posh Metropole Hotel. But when the case bleeds over into murder, machinations, and international intrigue, not everyone is eager to see where the clues might lead.

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