Wordsmiths

Vladimir Putin and Dmitry Medvedev could not simply ignore the unprecedented wave of popular discontent that has swept the country this winter, following last December’s Duma vote, which many consider to have been rigged. But often their statements make things worse, giving rise to ever more creative protest signs.

On December 6, Dmitry Medvedev thanked Russia’s Central Election Committee Chairman Vladimir Churov for his magical powers, because his prediction about voter turnout at the Duma polls was allegedly the closest to the real numbers.

Churov: My prognosis was the most exact, I was only two-tenths off, I said that there would be 60 percent.

Medvedev: My, you are almost a wizard. Some party leaders call you this.

Churov: No, I’m just an apprentice.

On December 15, Vladimir Putin quoted the powerful snake Kaa, from Rudyard Kipling’s Jungle Book, who used his immense strength and hypnotic powers against the stupid Bandar-log monkeys to save Mowgli.

There are people that have a Russian passport, but act in the interests of a foreign state and are paid foreign money, and we’ll try to work on contact with them. Often that is pointless or impossible. What can one say here? One can say in the end “Come here you Bandar-log.” I’ve always liked Kipling.

Vladimir Putin also bizarrely compared the white ribbons worn by protesters to condoms.

To tell you the truth, when I saw on TV that people had something on their lapels, I’ll say frankly, though it’s not quite decent, I thought that it was propaganda for fighting AIDS, that (they) had pinned on, pardon me, contraceptives. Though it wasn’t quite clear why they unfolded them.

Meanwhile, several cities in Siberia were very creative with their rallies. After authorities disallowed a demonstration, local students put together “nanorallies” made up of tiny toy figures from Legos and the toys inside Kinder Surprise chocolate eggs. Set up on snow-covered squares in Irkutsk (see photo), Barnaul, and other regional centers, nanorallies gathered dozens of toy protestors holding up signs like “Fair elections!” and even “They killed Kenny!” In Barnaul, police did not get the South Park reference and announced they would press charges. Against whom, it was not clear.