Say What?

Every once in a while someone asks me how to translate a particular phrase, and my answer is not that it can’t be translated or that it is hard to translate, but that there’s no point in translating it: We just don’t say it that way.

Languages have standard phrases or clichés that are used in particular circumstances, and translating them literally, or even loosely, often just won’t make sense in another language, which has its own, different clichés.

Take, for example, what you say when you hear about someone’s death. English speakers automatically exclaim, “I’m sorry!” Bad movie translations have the horrified person gasping, “О! Извините!” (Oh! Excuse me!) — as if the person were apologizing for murder. In Russian, the standard phrase is usually an expression of horror: “Какое горе!” (What a tragedy!) “Как жаль!” (How sad!) “Какой ужас!” (How awful!)

Or let’s say a Russian and an American come across some friends having a meal. The American might just say “Hello” or possibly, “Looks delicious!” Translated into Russian – “Как вкусно!” – this is unspeakably rude, as if you were about to pull up a chair and grab some fries. The Russian would automatically say, “Приятного аппетита!” (Bon appetit!) – something no American would say unless they were imitating Julia Child.

Or let’s take another standard situation: the family portrait. Americans line up and flash their pearly whites as soon as the photographer says, “Say cheese!” Russians, on the other hand, might choose to look serious, or thoughtful, or loving. But if photographers want them to light up, they’ll say “Улыбнитесь!” (Smile!) or “Улыбочку!” ([Give me a] smile!).

This, of course, does not apply to selfies (селфи).

Then there are situations where English speakers use a variety of standard phrases and Russians get to use just one: пожалуйста (please, if you please). Say you want to let someone go ahead of you in line. In English, they’d say, “After you,” if they are polite, and “You first,” if they are impolite or eight years old. Russians do a little half-bow and say: “Пожалуйста.” If you want to let an elderly person sit down on a bus, you might say, “Here, take my seat.” Russians: “Пожалуйста” and a small bow and gesture towards the seat. At the table, an English speaker will pass a serving dish and say, “Help yourself.” Russians: “Пожалуйста.” And when the diner says thank you, the American host replies, “You’re welcome.” Russians: “Пожалуйста.”

I want that word. Life would be so much easier.

Finally: the telephone call, where after Алло (Hello) nothing is the same. Actually, sometimes the differences start as soon as an older person in Moscow picks up the phone — or hits the ответить (answer) button on the cell phone — and says: “Слушаю” (I’m listening) or “Я вас слушаю” (I’m listening to you).

This English speaking caller starts off with, “This is Jane.” In Russian you identify yourself as the person doing the calling or bothering: “Вас беспокоит Жанна” (Zhanna is bothering you) or “Вам звонит Саша” (Sasha is calling you). The English query, “May I speak to Sam?” is usually in Russian “Можно [позвать] к телефону Сэма?” (Could you call Sam to the phone?)

If you’re Sam, you’ll say “This is Sam” or the very correct “This is he.” In Russian, someone might say “Это я” (It’s me), but that’s not very polite. Usually they say: “Я у телефона” (I’m on the telephone).

And at the end of your conversation, in Russian you say: “Созвонимся” — literally “we’ll call each other” — which is almost like the standard English sign off: “Keep in touch.”

Пожалуйста!