Better than a Hundred Rubles

Alexander Druz, a famous Russian знаток (expert) and long-time participant on the TV quiz program Что? Где? Когда? (What, Where, When?), once bet a friend that he could tell a joke about any subject. His friend took the bet and then lost soundly when Druz proceeded to regale him with jokes for hours, on all his chosen subjects. While I would never pretend to Druz’s level of erudition, after writing this column for five years I sometimes feel it would be possible to write a Survival Russian column on almost any topic. For this, we probably have the richness of the Russian language to thank.

Take for instance “сто” (100), the magic number of Young Russians which Russian Life  selected for its year-long series of profiles (published in 2001-2002). There are so many “hundred-related” things that they cannot fit into this space. But let’s get down to the basic ones.

The first is simple and quite mundane: it is the figure on our banknotes. Russians have many names for their 100 ruble note: from the old-fashioned and obsolete катенька (little Katya), to the rather neutral yet colloquial сотня, сотенная, the rude сотняга, and the contemporary стольник or the tender and cajoling стольничек. Whatever you call it, it always gives one pleasure to know that “У меня в кармане честная сотня ...” (“I have an honest hundred in my pocket”) – as Lyube lead singer Nikolai Rastor-guyev sings, anticipating a rowdy, weekend party.

Proverbs? Well, there is of course Не имей сто рублей, а имей сто друзей (Don’t have a hundred rubles, but a hundred friends), or the rather universal Лучше один раз увидеть, чем сто раз услышать. It’s better to see once than hear a hundred times.

It is not a proverb, but most Russian (and American, I suspect) parents say it enough to their kids that it should perhaps qualify as one: “Ну что мне, сто раз надо повторять?!” (“What do I have to do, repeat myself 100 times?”)

As this example suggests, 100 is a standard bearer for idiomatic exaggeration and emphasis. If a Russian wants to emphasize that he does not need something (or someone) he might say сто лет он мне не нужен, (I wouldn’t need it in a hundred years.) or, better yet, сто лет он мне не приснился (I wouldn’t dream of it in a hundred years.).

One hundred is also a number near and dear to the hearts of war veterans. For there is a long tradition of distributing to soldiers a фрoнтовые сто грамм (100 grams at the front) of vodka or spirits before a battle.

In an interesting twist of old and new lexicon, young Russians (i.e. 25 and under) have combined the old weight measurement пуд (a pood, 16 kilos), with 100 to mean ”sure thing” or “ironclad.” Thus, a response to “Are you sure?” could be “Сто пудов!” An adverb has grown out of this: стопудово, a synonym of точно or железно. And the Russian press has coined a special musical phrase: стопудовый хит meaning a “huge hit.”

As these examples show, hundred-related words and expressions tend to have positive connotations – for instance the famous сотки (one sotok equals 1000 m2 – one-tenth of a hectare) – private plots where Russians grow their own vegetables and/or have a dacha (on a шесть соток – six hundredths – size plot). An exception to this is, of course, the infamous Чёрная сотня (the “black hundred” known as черносотинцы, which, among other things, perpetrated pogroms during the tsarist era.

It is hard, when discussing 100, for the mind not to wander to that other important figure in Russian culture – 150. This, of course, is the common measurement (in grams) for a shot of vodka as served in a Russian restaurant. In times of war they may have passed out vodka in 100 gram allotments, but in times of peace, it is usually “по сто пятьдесят.” But do not take my word for it: next time you are in a typical Russian cafe, order “Два раза по сто пятьдесят!” (“two at 150”). Even if you have a thick American accent in Russian, you will win the waiter over. Сто пудов! (Especially if, at the end of the meal, you leave behind a crisp, neat стольничек – about $3 – as a tip.